TOPSHOP CRAZINESS, SOME BOOKS AND THAT BIG PANTIE BUSINESS I HAD FORGOTTEN TO MENTION

Good friday boys and girls. Lets just get to that picture up there. Now you know the way 

I get excited excited every time our TOI here gets a nod from important persons? 

YES! Bata gave us a nod, how cool is that, its not that it was a certificate or a medal, 

but a small comment on that Converse post I had done previously. 

If you do not remember read something HERE.

So I was not lying about getting my Northstar. Just wanted to get that off my chest. 
Okay I wanted to thump my chest.

There is a universal code somewhere out there, that a chucks shot must be 

accompanied by beer. I follow rules.

So I was browsing the net the other day when I came across something that is worth 

mentioning. Women take clothes seriously. Really if we did not, do you think I would 

be here. Kate Moss is back at TOPSHOP, I really do love this Kate and her cheap high 

end stuff. Affordable and great.

Yaani this is how the humans came out to meet Ms. Moss' new collection. I know I love

clothes but surely, this is a bit too much.

But that aside, Ms. Moss showed up and showed out!!

I await for next season so I can look like that. It is only time then all these will be at Gikosh 

and Toi. Patience pays. I read that somewhere and I am very sure the person who came 

up with this phrase is a poor person.

I have picked out some pieces from the collection I liked for your consideration enjoyment. 

Be inspired and if you have relas huko London, ask them to send you something. 

Otherwise be inspired.

You know how I love leather and leather like small jackets? well here is my favourite!!!

And what would the world be without sequins? Somebody should volunteer to reward 

me for the thankless payless job and I am doing over at TOI and just buy me this 

jacket and the sequinned top.

Last but not least for the bohemian chic. There you go! I want to strongly suggest this 

look to the corporate girl, you know on weekends and girls night out? there is a look 

your people are expecting sindio, there is a way people expect you to look as a corporate 

woman, go full throttle   ethnic. Then walk into the room and be very stern like main 

British and say "The Queen has a arrived" You will thank me for the look on their faces.

BIG PANTIES

Ya'll know big panties are good. They are comfortable and...... well comfortable. But I have 
noticed the girls want to have their cake and eat it  (I have never understood that phrase) 
I am sure it is not appropriate here but just roll with it. I was saying you cannot wear big panty and want to wear a tight dress or trouser.

Do you see the problem? I thought so. Seriously what could possible be nice about this? 

I think women should have double mirrors in the house, so you can see your front and back 

before you leave the house. Or real friends, every woman should have real girlfriends who tell 

you about your backside. 

Okay those ones are just wearing very very small panties. Did you know undies also have sizes? why the hell would you want to buy a child's panties? and the other one is thinking white panties are okay with a white see through dress.

Anyway there is no problem regarding clothing that cannot be fixed. If you cannot do thongs or 

go full commando, think SPANXS.

Ladies and gentlemen this is a spanxs

It might not be the sexiest underwear on the planet, but that I cant deal with right now. 

The good thing about this clothing is that it also puts everything in place. Being together is key, you cannot be all over the place. Things just hanging left and right.

Have you ever wondered (and really you should only have wondered if you are very young) 

why those hollywood celebrities you like to stalk always look flawless on the red carpet in tight dresses and you are just think oh my God! they are so flawless and smooth on the backside like their asses are ironed every morning before they leave the house?, mh!

SPANX! Look closer...... Take all the time you need.

Not close enough?

Alafu ku kaa vizuri and getting out of  a car like a lady ndio utajifunza. They come in all shapes, colours and sizes so, just get your favourite. And do not forget that size is important. I do not know why women always buy a size smaller, like you are a size 14 and you are buying a 12, you do realise it is not going to make you smaller, its like in our heads we think when you undress the body will see the new small size piece and shrink to fit.

And then walk like a lady, tu small small steps, one foot infront of the other. I am positive 

you will thank me later.

Just so you do not feel bad, I am also on my way to get several as my ass is beginning 

to jiggle when I walk. Nothing to be ashamed of, happens to the best of us lazy people 

who do not take working out seriously.

TOI BOOKS

I have been reading but, not sharing. This is bad, very bad. I had started this segment 
but the devil came between us.

If you are a book lover then you have heard of this stunning woman. If you have not heard 
of her you might want to reconsider the space on earth you are you are occupying because 
it is going to waste.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

And isn't she loooovelyy?? (insert Stevie Wonder's Song here)

What you want to know is that Ngozi's books are published by Kwani Trust.

Kwani Trust is a Kenyan based literary network dedicated to developing quality creative 

writing and committed to the growth of the creative industry through the publishing and distribution of contemporary African writing, offering training opportunities, producing literary events and establishing and maintaining global literary networks. Our vision is to create a 

society that uses its stories to see itself more coherently.

Ebu stand up so we can all clap for ourselves. Enyewe this our country is going places. 

Anyway Chimamanda is very very smart. 

And since I am a person who can never be left behind in that bandwagon.

I started off with  Half of a Yellow Sun.

Unaona hapo juu wameandika "Heartbreaking, funny, exquisitely written and without a doubt, 

a literary master piece and a classic"? All true oo. This is a very good book. But Pantu 

Nollywood iliaribu kila kitu in my brain, I finished that book and murmured a curse of acute diarrhoea to the person who brought Nollywood to Kenya and his offsprings to the end of 

life------I stole that curse from this book. 

I hear Half of a Yellow Sun is going Hollywood and we thank God because Nollywood would 

have killed us with Half of A Yellow Sun part 7, Half of Yellow Beyonce, Half of a Yellow Yellow

part 3. etc etc until I don't know when.

And because I was very impressed I am onto AMERIKANAH!!!

Eh this one is a favourite, I am feeling it because I was once in ze diaspora. If you are in the diaspora toka kwa nyumba saa hii huu go get this book. BRILLIANT!!! 

There is another storo I am going to piga for you in my next post, it is of that man I almost 
killed. If I had killed him, I would have gone back and killled him again. But I need further consultation with the girls.

It is FRIIDAAYYYY! and it has just rained!!! Watu wakamatane!!!! And do not forget to celebrate us, we are at 12,801 likes on FACEBOOOOOK!!!

 

Do you know the way the women have been fanning themselves furiously while watching this video? Including yours truly? They have just done a small video thanking the fans on facebook, alafu I go to the comment section another mama there has gone on and on and one about how she liked Sauti Sol and now they are being cheap they are talented and they do not need to do this bla bla bla - Shenzi type. Bure kabisa, she has annoyed me with her useless preaching.

Anyway I really do not feel the Friday hype, you know being unemployed and stuff. But do have a good one, a gud one, a gudu wan!