Am Back! but while I was away......

Ebu look at that glamour up there. My friends, it has been a while, but the things that have happened since I have been away?!!! so much beauty and glamour and wonderfulness am overwhelmed!!!

I dont even know where to start. Ok, I know I have to continue with the wedding story, I thought we had learnt something till I watched last week's wedding show, and is Noni getting ligher or its just me. Anyway, story of weddings is going to continue after this.

So, while I was away......
  1.  Hudda happened
  2. Victoria happened , Victoria is the glamorous being up there, is no lie my sister, this country is going to fall down and die from too much fineness!
  3. And the other girl on BBA too happened.    
The combined forces of these 3 women is enough to put you on your knees, trust me.

Look at the way Miss Victoria shinning her glorious self at us mortals! Victoria is a musician. Now dont go to hard on the word musician there/ Just enjoy the music, and please go to youtube and find her. The gods of weaves, wigs, bowties, stockings and big panties are weeping with pure joy. And you probably should too!


I am amazed that Hudda was kicked out of the house that fast!!! Aki kenyans we are haters. Even her majesty Ms. Chantal Biya am sure would have approved/ I always think that when whoever is in charge of all person clever, fine and beautiful in Kenya thought about a representative, the first person that came to mind, in fact I think Hudda floated in the air, like a fairytale queen.

wouldn't you call that fineness, and now we have all forgotten Hudda. So Sad. so so sad!!!

Between I knew Hudda before people knew her, sometimes back, way before BBA, she had beef with another chick called Vee S Beiby (okay just watch the video, I feel dumb already just writing that) But let it be known that I watched this video and no, I do not know where I heard or read that they had beef.
After you are done watching this, please watch Vee's too, because you have nothing better to do with your life and this is a national matter that you should be aware of.


Aki I hope that is her name. That is our other rep in the BBA! I dont know, but we must have done something good. I mean this is something. Look at her eyebrows, even she is shocked at herself, there are people so fine that they amaze themselves, constantly surprised that they are actually living here amongst us. I tried to google Annabel, this is what came up, such fineness.

Having presented these fine ladies. May I say that I have been away because I was playing wife. I can be a wife. Please lets all stand up and put our hands together for all the WIVES!!! its not easy being a wife. 

I was being nice and shit, cooking, and stuff. I have never been that nice, am always the crazy girlfriend. But this time I was soo nice, I used to go to the mirror look at myself and wonder who is this woman?!!
Then one morning the mofo did something thing so spectacularly stupid its unbelievable, for me its the ultimate fuck you, and I dont take disrespect very well; its is a miracle am not the one on news today of I killed someone, I was going to burn his house down, then kill him and make it look like the smurfs did it. I am a strong person. I am one of those people I was talking about who amaze themselves. I walked, I dont remember the walking, but I did, it cost me like 4kgs, as in I lost weight from the effort of keeping it together while putting one foot infront of the other,  and I did not walk long, it was like 3 meters to the cab. Aki if I tell you the whole storro you will congratulate me and give me a medal of honor. So anyway uwife imeisha; I am back, on the prowl and lethal.

That aside, I have put up some nice things together so prepare for a long read. The wedding thing is not  over, like I said, I know am repeating myself, but its for emphasis. So am going to continue from where I left and throw in a few not relevant bits.
This is probably where you should insert that song Acid Tongue.

Hehe, I am a liar!
Ok, I have been thinking of going shopping but aki this weather. Plus I almost killed someone, those are excellent excuses to last me 3 years:-) But I will go, I just need to collect myself and nimesha jicollect. So that is something you want to look forward to. WHERE IS THE SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!


Oh the ArtCafe story, since the racial card has been pulled, I have an excellent idea, if you have to go just paint yourself white, you know the way the geishas do? once you are completely white, walk in and say, I hope you can see me, now that am whiter than the whites, can I please get your best table:-))))) 
and I dint re-read this thing. 

1 comment:

  1. LOL Dama...this is too good..just the right sharp touch. I love it